I have often thought, Why didn't Heavenletters come to me sooner? Why could I have had them when I was twenty-five?

Of course, I know I was far from ready, not that I really think I'm ready now.

And over the past ten or eleven years, I've wondered why Heavenletters are not more well-known throughout the world? There has been incredible progress, and yet it would be wonderful to have more.

I was not ready for "success."

I have often thought, "If only I could have known what the future held for me -- that Heavenletters would come to me -- what would that have changed? Certainly my self-confidence etc.

Over fifteen years ago -- it could have been twenty years -- an astrologer told me that I would do spiritual writing. Here was someone telling me, and I scoffed it off.

Around that time too a beautiful chiropractor whom I spoke to on the phone interrupted himself to say: "Oh, you are going to have a great many spiritual blessings. You are going to be so happy."

I heard the words but they didn't really mean anything. I was happy to know I would have blessings, yet I didn't take it as fact.

Again, I would say the time wasn't right, and I had to find out for myself.

And yet I still wonder that if I had really known and really believed that I would be doing what I am doing now, how different those years before Godwriting might have been, and yet, possibly knowing, I would have been self-conscious and trying to hasten the day, and everything that has evolved without my full awareness might not have been so natural and self-evolving.

The way I feel now is that it was better for me not to know but just to live my life from moment to moment not knowing more than life itself showed me.