Gloria to new Heavenreaders:

Margaret, who writes the following letter, has written God for help here several beautiful times. Her saga began with her having lost her husband, her married friends, her job, and, hardest of all, her 15-year old son to drugs. She was bereft and in great pain and asked God to give her her heart back.

If you, as a new Heavenreader, would like to see her earlier questions, God's answers, and the stages of unfolding transformation, email [me] and ask for previous Margaret installments, and they will be sent to you.

Margaret to God:

Dearest Heavenly Father, let me start by saying how grateful I am for all the help I've been noticing lately. I've been asking a lot, and You've been answering a lot. I guess You always have been, I just didn't realize it before. I'm learning some new habits — the result is that I am feeling much lighter than I have felt for a very long time. I like it!

In an earlier response, You said that I would wake up one morning and my grief would be gone; I did, and it is. Forgive me that this surprised me. I am still a neophyte at this, but I deeply appreciate all Your guidance and speedy answers. It's getting easier and easier for me to ask and trust and surrender. No more delays!

After I took my first big step of letting go and released my dear son J. to You, a chain of events took place that culminated in his going AWOL from his rehab program. They called me just as I was going to sleep one night to tell me that he had run away. They would try to find him and bring him back. Did I want them to call me and let me know if/when they found him, although they couldn't promise that they could keep him there? I surprised myself by telling them no, I'd call them in the morning to see where things stood. I did my best to let it go, turn itover to You, and I further surprised myself by actually going to sleep.

That's something I'm not usually good at even under the best conditions! (Please help me with this, Lord)

In the morning I found that J. had been located around midnight and placed in a nearby detention center for twenty-four hours. This was a locked facility, and if a placement wasn't found for him by the end of that day, he would probably be put in a shelter (not a locked facility) to await placement. I felt that he would probably run again at the very next opportunity, so I decided that I must see him.

I drove the two hours to the place he was being kept, and to my surprise, he seemed relieved that I had come. We sat together quietly for a few minutes, and I said the few things that were in my heart. I told him that I loved him, gave him an 800 number for an organization that helps kids on the run, and told him that I would be asking You to keep him safe, and that I hoped someday he would be able to let You into his heart and let go of all his anger. Basically, I "released" him.

While I was with him, word came that he would be transferred that very day to another facility — one that was locked, very strict, and just for boys. He was mortified, and vowed that he absolutely would run. Having made that promise, he was too angry or frightened to look at me or say goodbye or visit any more, so I left, blessing him in my heart.

I figured it would be weeks before he would be willing to speak to me again. On my way out, I asked the workers to make sure someone at the new facility would notify me when J arrived safely, because I knew his intentions. Then I drove the two hours home, praying all the way that it was all for the best.

In the evening, a call came. The worker told me that J was there and everything was fine. I thanked her, and started to hang up, but was astonished when she informed me that he wanted to speak to me. I expected him to keep up his wall of silence for weeks, as he had when he blamed me for his first placement.

So J got on the line, and we exchanged hello's, then silence. I don't know what I expected — to get blasted, I guess.

I said, "What is it, J? The worker said you wanted to speak to me."

There was another pause, and then he gathered himself and said, "…Well, um… what's up?"

What's up. What's up?! What's up! I drove 200 miles today to see my son locked up and to maybe say goodbye to him forever and he says, "What's up!" It was priceless. My heart burst out laughing.

I realized quickly enough that we were to make casual conversation, so I asked him about his room, and other small things and wished him well and we hung up.

I was singing inside. I still have a shred of a relationship with my son, and I praise and thank You for it from the bottom of my singing heart. To some people, this may not seem like much, but to me, it's glorious.

I know we aren't "done" here. I've no idea how it should turn out, nor even how I want it to turn out, but I do know that You will come up with something very good.

I pray for You to do that — not a pintful of something very good, but a universe brimful of something very, very good for my/Your dear boy and for me. We're already gallons ahead of where I could will us to be by myself.

So, thank You, Beloved Almighty Father. You say You'll come through, and You do, and I love You for it. This situation is all Yours; You just point me where You want me to go.

God:

To My dear beloved heavenly Margaret. Like Me, you give hope to the wounded masses. This includes your son.

Because you have released so much, your son is beginning to as well. You loosen, and J. loosens. This is how it works.

Even if you and J. did not meet with each other, your releasing of him to Me would have reached him and unwound his tension and eased his heart.

You, Margaret, are an example of how I work. I work through you. Most miracles are performed with the help of ones like you.

Keep all of Us appraised of your and J.'s continued progress through life. You are a God success story, are you not?

And, yes, We are not done.

I also want to mention that Heavenreaders carried you in their hearts and prayers, and will continue to cheer you and J on. Your happiness is theirs. Do you feel it?

Gloria:

Dear God, after another marvelous Margaret breakthrough, I almost don't want to say anything to break the spell.

But would it be correct to say that Margaret has surrendered to You?

God:

Yes. And in the process, she transforms her life.

Gloria:

I know someone who communicates with You a lot. I have felt recently that she tries to make You surrender to her. I felt that she was interrogating You, calling You on the carpet, like she was an inquisitioner. We see differently. She sees my relationship with You as lovey-dovey, and I wonder if hers is disrespectful.

God:

You are not trying to protect Me, are you?

Gloria:

I told my friend that I thought she was being rough.

God:

It is all to laugh at, Gloria, you, as well as your friend. You are not going to spend your energy trying to protect Me, are you?

Gloria:

I won't.

God:

Your friend has not yet surrendered, that's all.

It is not your concern. It is between her and Me.

Release everything to Me, Gloria, including what other people are doing.

Will you do that?

No one needs to intervene for Me. I assure you I can take care of Myself — and you — and Margaret — and J. — and your friend — and all the beating hearts in the world.

Mother Divine:

You were honest with your friend. Then release it all to God.

You are not a mother hen responsible for the whole brood.

You love God, and that is enough. Love God with all your heart, and that love multiplies in the world and Heaven.

Love God, and give your concerns to Him. He will clean up everything. He is a cleaner of hearts. He knows what He is doing, and He knows how to do it.

And, at the feet of God is a good place to be.