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Today, I remembered...

Today, I remembered...

it's not the person that's the problem, it's my thought patterns.

So, I walk into the bathroom - towels strewn all over the floor. A flurry
of thoughts ensues - "Jack focuses too much on his appearance"
(he'd presumably used them to coiff his 15 year old mop of hair), "he
and his father are so inconsiderate", "Jack will have a hard time adjusting
to being on his own because he's so spoiled and used to getting his own
way and having other people do things for him". Wow! A lot of mental
manure in a short space, wouldn 't you agree?

Then, I remembered Byron Katie in the book "Loving What Is" talked
about how she used to argue with her kids about not picking up their
socks. After she had a breakdown and subsequent awakening, she
just picked up the socks and enjoyed it!

Now stay with me here -- this is good stuff. The socks (or in my case, the
towels) were just socks. And picking up the socks to see the clean floor
underneath is a joy.

My point? When we see things as they truly are rather than cover them
with untrue and un-useful thoughts and judgments, we enjoy life. We are
then truly flowing in the present, not mentally fighting ourselves.

Our rightful place, I'd say.

Today, I remembered...

This sounds nice, but it's not so easy. My son and my husband have filled our house with 'things', and I've tried to feel joyful when I'm trying to clean and get some order. The result is that I get very depressed, because there's no end to the cleaning, and I feel guilty because I can't feel joy in doing it. So what's your advice?

Today, I remembered...

I have been where you are Paula. I still go there sometimes!

I also understand that it's hard to change our conditioned ways of thinking, that's the real issue here, not the physical stuff (the people and their junk!)

The thing that jumps out at me from your words is your feeling guilty for not enjoying yourself. That sounds like the biggest obstacle to happiness of all.

Sounds like you need a combination of the best of your human and spiritual qualities to transcend this situation. I'd try calmly talking to your people and impressing on them how much the clutter, etc. bothers you. See if you can compromise with them, possibly confining their stuff to certain areas of the house that you don't have to deal with. And give yourself time everyday to meditate, pray, take a walk - whatever centers you and opens you up to your divinity.

And most of all (it sounds so trite, I know!) stay in the moment. When you are picking up something to put it away, don't think about all the other things you've already picked up today or in the last twenty years or the huge pile that's in front of you. Just pick up the one object, maybe look at it and see something in it you've never seen before and lovingly put it away.

Wishing you peace and contentment,

Today, I remembered...

I felt a need to respond to your post below. It touched something in my heart today as I was cleaning. It’s not advice, it’s a Thank you, because it helped me remember.
In June of 1988 my fiancé, 26 years old, suffered a heart attack and transitioned. A month to the day - July, my sister 36 transitioned through an asthma attack on a family beach vacation. In August, my father was diagnosed with breast cancer and later succumbed to that “dis-ease” and transitioned in ’91. In September, my Grandmother suffered a stroke, in October my uncle suffered a heart attack, in November, my best friend and her baby transitioned from AIDS related infections (infected when giving blood back in 80 and didn’t know she carried the virus, the baby’s own immune system did not void the virus fast enough after being born as pneumonia took both of them), December (Christmas Eve) my best friend/soul brother, transitioned through a motorcycle accident. For the next 5 months, each month brought a transition for someone close to my heart and life. At that time I thought I was being attacked. Finally in 2003 my life took it’s own transition after “burying the last of my family” and I found myself in a place of independence…not “aloneness.” I looked around and all of these incredibly joyous souls of light had left “all their stuff” for me to take care of…..and today I was cleaning (yes, I am still cleaning up the stuff and mess left behind from all of their transitions) and thought to myself, “I can not get caught up, when will this cleaning ever end.” When I read your previous post and then this one today, I began to “truly see” the mess and “stuff” I was cleaning for what it is….”sweet gentle reminders” that everyone I love is still with me. I can look at the things I pack away and remember the story of where it came from and why it is here. I see why it is in “my” life now. It brings me joy, even sometimes when I shed a tear of selfishness because they are no longer here with me, I feel their joy and joy blesses me. I know it sounds cliché, but as I clean I feel the joy and the blessing of having them all in my life and even though they are no longer here “in this illusion” they are beside me reminding me that they are present. Their presence, whether physical or spiritual is the constant gift of love and of light. It is also a lesson to me in that I must find a way for the “stuff” to bless others so when it is my turn to transition, the “stuff” won’t be left to “worry and challenge” someone else. My memories, I take with me. These daily gentle reminders are the gifts of joy in my life that show me as I clean them, pack them, store them, share them….that I was and am still loved… and how wonderful that is to know. 
As you pick up those “gentle reminders,” remember that in their own special way….they are love notes to you…and out of the frustration of cleaning…your joy will come.
          “The moment we change the way we look at things, things we look at change.”
"all we have to decide is what to do with the time we've been given..."
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From: paula [mailto:Spiritual_Messages [at] heavenletters [dot] org]
Sent: Friday, July 07, 2006 12:12 AM
To: Spiritual_Messages [at] heavenletters [dot] org
Subject: [HeavenLetters Board Other Spiritual Messages] RE: Today, I remembered...

This sounds nice, but it's not so easy. My son and my husband have filled our house with 'things', and I've tried to feel joyful when I'm trying to clean and get some order. The result is that I get very depressed, because there's no end to the cleaning, and I feel guilty because I can't feel joy in doing it. So what's your advice?

Safe in My arms you're only dreaming. -
Al sicuro tra le Mie braccia state solo sognando.
Love is the Answer.-Amore è la Risposta

-------------------- m2f --------------------

Sent by HeavenLetters message board ( Read this topic online here: <>

-------------------- m2f --------------------

Today, I remembered...

Dear Uriel,
thanks for your beautiful and touching reply. Your story reminded me of a friend of mine who's been losing all her relatives, friends, boyfriends during a period of two years. I wonder why some people have (chosen) these experiences?
I think it's different to clean up things left to us by our beloved people and the mess caused by people who are still with us. When I lost my parents, I loved looking through their things and remembering, and I even wrote a book based on my mother's diaries, but then I let them go. And it was so beatiful.
But when I've just cleaned the bathroom and my son goes there and washes his football boots and everything is covered with mud again, I don't find much joy in that. And I do love cleaning up, but it's all the stuff everywhere that doesn't permit me to clean, that bothers me. Anyway, it's not such a big issue as it seems. I'm happy it gave us the possibility to share with each other. Everything is perfect and necessary.
Thanks to you as well Suzanne.

Today, I remembered...

all this I know, too

I left them with their mud and all the things they bring on to the floor...

I sorted all the things... moved my things out...

and went...

now they (the boys) learn to live with their whatever...

it is/was hard to leave but it was love that let me go...

they are going to do it their own way...
and their way is not mine...

I think it was me who could not stand all this things around on the floor or so

and as they did only want me to clean up
I told them that i*ll not stay longer with them...

they accepted it
but the think me "whattever"...

and all the calls the first time have finished
now we call when "the fire burns to high"...

but my sons are 21 now
and so the y are adults..

love you

and so