Finding Yourself
As you come to know Me, and consciously know Me well, you have seen more of My light reflected in the eyes of those you meet. You have seen this. You have noted this. You have had peak moments when your heart was full of Me and full of the world. You have had moments, days, weeks, months, when all is Unity. How far you have come. And then, perhaps suddenly, perhaps gradually, you may sense yourself falling away from life in the world, or the world is slipping away from you. How can this be? How can you feel so present with Me and yet so far from the world at large and even the people in your life.
There may come a time, when you know Me, when you share Me, when I am notably established in your heart, and well, beloveds, you settle in and find that seemingly nothing can compare to the sense of At-Homeness that you feel with Me. It is as if everything pales next to Me. You have Me fully in your awareness, and not the world. Suddenly or gradually, there are those moments when life in the relative world does not fill your heart to the same extent that I do. The world and the people in it may not have the charm for you that they once did. World life feels flat. You move in it, and yet you feel out of it. You feel half-hearted about the world. You feel you have lost something and that you have gone backwards. The world and the people in it become more like cardboard world and people. This certainly does not feel like evolution to you.
What is happening is that your personal involvement has lessened. Your personal ownership has lessened. You may even feel that you do not exist. You can no longer feel the boundaries of yourself.
It is really true, beloveds, that as you find yourself, you lose yourself. This may feel like separation to you. You are separating from your personal self. The personal is fading. This may feel like a loss to you and a step backwards. You may feel that you have lost your heart, not given it away to another, simply lost your heart somewhere in the ether, and you feel you may never find it again. Hang on.
Life will not be the same for you. The world will not be the same. When you come out of this tunnel you feel you are in, you and the goldenness of life will be stronger. This that I speak of is beyond the Union of Heart you have been used to. It will be great Union with Me and a reunion of sorts with the world.
The vicissitudes of life will not affect you as they once did. Emotional attachment will be less. For now it may seem to you that you are disconnected. You are disconnecting from the past and your past sense of what life is.
You have just climbed a new mountain, beloveds, and you are at a higher elevation where you see differently. You may miss your old mountain and the view you had. This larger perspective may not be what you thought it would be, and yet you will see clearly and you will integrate with the new height you have risen to. You do get to where you wanted to be. You are like a boy scout who went to the camp he wanted to go to, and then he finds himself homesick. Soon enough, he becomes acclimated to camp.
Soon enough, you will acclimate to your new mountain. You will serve the Universe greatly.
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