Friends Are Teachers

Sutra Number: 
510
Heaven Sutra Date: 
06/03/2000

Abby to God:

Dear God, I was wondering, how important are human relationships? I've heard it said by many people whom I consider to be wise that life is basically pointless without people that you care about. That we should measure our lives by how much love we give and receive. It's easy to believe this, but is it necessarily true? I like to think it is important to have good friends and loved ones because, as they say in 'Les Miserables', "To love another person is to see the face of God". But I'm curious about it.

God, I love all my friends, but I often feel as though some of them really don't care about me. Maybe this is just like the issue we discussed about my dad and I should just remember that they're human just like me and can't be perfect. I don't know.

I simply want to know how to cope when I'm stuck at home for the summer with a bunch of friends who never call me or ask me to do things with them. I care about them and it hurts me that they don't seem to want to spend time with me.

God to Abby:

Dear Abby, I tell My children not to expect, because in expecting is control. You do not expect your old friends to throng over you, but also do not expect that they will not.

Friends. Most friends in life are passing, dear Abby. Little turns in the road that you meet and leave. Passing sights.

That's not so bad, Abby. You grow and your friends grow, and often you grow different ways. They go a different way, and so do you. The timing isn't always what you might want.

Abby, just having a familiar face around isn't enough. You want more connection than that. And yet you do not want everyone to be best friend. Who could handle that?

Friends meet and part. It is like a dance, dear one. That's all it is.

That friends move in different orbits makes room for new friends and allows new growth.

No one stays the same.

It is a little different with a parent. Your father will always be your father. The relationship may change, but the basic fact of it will not. In friendships, a stranger becomes a friend, and a friend becomes a stranger. What seems important to you now may be obscure to you later. The waves of life roll on.

Do not expect, but look forward.

Your life at school was very accounted for. Now you have a bank of time in the summer that is open for you to fill.

Do not ask too much of yourself nor of others.

Give yourself the freedom you bestow on others.

New slate.

The truth is you can never know what will befall you. But I will tell you that goodness will befall you. Will you accept My word?

There is another aspect of life to look at. Most people are selfish, Abby. When you find that others are selfish, it is not to be amazing or shocking. Most people care about themselves. Others around them are incidental. Useful or not useful to them. Or useful for a while and then not anymore.

What people say is not always the truth of what they feel. They themselves may not know what they feel.

Now we leave other people and come to you.

Pay more attention to what you feel than what other people feel or seem to feel.

The measure of your life is not in the number of continued friendships.

All friends are teachers.

And the purpose of it all is to lead you to the Friend of All. And then to lead you to a mutuality of that Friendship shared with others. Our Friendship does not have to be spoken, but it has to be shared. Sort of imagine a wand you wave with each person you meet. Waving this wand says, "God is here." That is enough, or that is a beginning.

Do not measure your life.

I have measured it for you, and I have said it is good.

Do not compare your life.

Do not try to make your life something on a scale.

The worth of your life is immeasurable.

Life is not to be measured.

It is to be opened to joy.

Open your life, Abby.

Open it up.

You do not have to follow in tracks that others have made.

Take your own steps.

Keep your eye on Me.

Life doesn't have to be the way others think. It doesn't have to be the way you think either. But your life is yours.

Consider your life a beautiful purse you carry. You fill up your purse and you take out and you fill up again. Other people do not fill your purse. It is yours. You can consider what other people say, but it is your purse to fill as you wish.

What a remarkable discovery. Your life is yours.

How do you breathe now?

* * *

Barbara to Gloria:

Dear Gloria, about what you said June l, I just wanted to send you an e-hug! I know Heavenletters are prepared in advance, and you may already be through to the other side of that Heaven journey, but I want you to know, I have also been there. And it does pass. It is just stormy weather.

It must be the ego getting so loosened, feeling so threatened, that it makes a really awful stink so that all the awareness is on it. But, like God said, the ego is really nothing, so just let it go. What remains? Only God.

Ruth to Gloria:

It sounds as though you've been going thru a bit of a rough time, and I hope you're feeling more comfortable. You seem to me to be such an example of always being connected to God that it's hard for me to realize that sometimes you go thru difficult times.

Lots of love to you for no reason and for every reason.

Heavenletters is such a wonderful addition to my life.

Gloria to Barbara and Ruth:

That Heavenletter was written almost three weeks ago! When I read it just before publication, I thought, "Who is this lady writing this?" When it sank in it was me, I had to think hard what it was all about! So, yes, the anquishing passed!

Thank you, dear friends.