The Gate...part 2
So...here we are standing at the gate...noticing a latch...opening carefully and quietly and wondering what will be revealed. And just as I push the gate forward, a realization hits me: “Why this is just like before...a new garden appears...nothing really different. But I feel different...I feel a peace inside that is hard to describe...a “peace that passeth understanding” A peace that is pleasantly enduring...hmmm. A peace, I believe, that was always there...but is now...amazingly revealed. And something else...something quite different. I used to be always looking for something that would satisfy me...seeking something that would quench. Its like all of my experiences before were quizzically conditional. That is, I was under the misapprehension that once I had a particular experience, that I would be permanently rewarded for it. Hmm...Nothing of the kind exists now. I am now just experiencing for the sake of the experience. No...not quite. Something else. What could it be? Love? yes love. I love being here in this new beingness. For, as I said, the garden is pretty much the same...but something has happened to my perception. Hmm. So to return to love. Yes, something to do with love. Here is a clue coming: As I look around the garden, my eyes are lighting on different objects and scenes: a rose, the sky, an arbor, some soil. And as my eyes do this...it feels like my eyes are not merely looking...but loving at the same time. And at the same time, my heart feels warm. And also, and I think this is very important, whatever I see now...I sense and feel the same love. I.E., I don’t feel more loving looking at a pretty rose compared to the vast sky. Hmm. And another thing, my mind seems to have slowed down...Before, I always felt like I was constantly multi-tasking: e.g.: greeting someone and at the same time worrying about what to say next or if I turned the oven off or whatever. So much was always happening at once! But now...it feels like whatever I appear to be focusing on...just that is happening! What a blessed relief. And another thing that now occurs to me: I don’t appear to be as much as my body as before. As I walk into the garden...I notice the scene shifting as this body moves through and into the scene. But, honestly, I don’t feel myself to be the body. Now... I’m not really sure who this I that I call myself is. But the question does not seem to matter as before. Hmm. I love this new beingness.
Shall we meet one another in the garden? I am waiting...and do not mind waiting one bit. Loving you always! Jimi.