Beloveds, it’s not necessary that you understand everything. Therefore, it is not necessary that you analyze everything or seek to explain everything in a logical fashion. You have a limited idea of logic. Life just does not fit into every category. You are asking questions that don’t have the answers you want.
Whatever I say, I understand that you are going to ask Why questions, yet, as you see now, questions that begin with Why look backwards. You want to go forward.
Ask yourself: “What do I do now? Now, where do I go? Where do I take myself in my thoughts and my actions? What’s my first step? Whatever caused what I see as a mess, how do I get out of it?”
The question: “What is my first step?” is a great question. You are not asking how you solve or resolve a situation. The fact is that you may not really know. You do know that you have to put it behind you.
What is one first step? There may be many first steps. Right now you want to grab one. The one you grab does not have to be perfect. It just has to be one you grab. Once you take a step, any step, you are way ahead. Your first step does not have to be an ultimate step.
It’s also possible that your first thought is all you need.
Beloveds, when you ask Why questions, you are often asking: “Am I to blame? How am I to blame? Who is to blame? This person, that person, God?”
What matters the history of a difficult situation? You can look for a specific cause all your life and never get an answer that satisfies. Beloveds, there may be no resolution to the history. And, even if the “right” answer should appear, where does it take you?
We can say that a difficulty comes from the person’s early relationship with his mother. Where does that leave you? Of course, a difficulty arises from somewhere in the past, and someone is reliving it. The trigger is always from the past, and this is also the case for you. A difficulty comes from where you were looking or from where you were not looking at all. What is the difference? What earthly good does it do you to know that someone who takes offense from you sees you subconsciously as his mother or his first-grade teacher?
Have understanding beforehand. People are caught up in all kinds of things. Undoubtedly, they are reacting to something that has nothing to do with you except you happen to be there.
And why are you, My beloveds, upset in return? From your idea of something that was pounded into you -- that you, for instance, are at fault? It wasn’t fair then, and isn’t fair now. Let it go. There’s no virtue in having a duel over it, even if the duel just keeps going on in your mind.
Honor the three little words: “Let it go.” Three remarkable words that can change lives. You are above tit for tat. You are above reprisal. You are to be beyond explanations and trying to even things out. If you win over someone else, what have you won?
Now you ask: “What about honesty between people? We want to clear this up, don’t we?”
If you can do this without anger and argument, well-done. More power to you. Yet, sometimes you really do have to let go of emotions you can’t fix, no matter how much you want to.
Perhaps the other person will come back to you and offer a laurel leaf, and you will respond openly. You are not the whole factor. As best you can, you are making life better for you and for others. No one always hits a perfect score.
But that’s okay. Everyone is learning to move on.