Gloria to God:
Dear God, a couple of issues are really coming up for me that I am having to deal with. One right now is my physical health. I know the real issue is my faith in You, dear God.
I just read over your August 13 letter to Annette. You could have been talking to me. You said: "There isn't anything I can't fix…Believe in Me and yourself more than someone else…"
I went to a chiropractor yesterday, and this noted man urged me to go to a cardiologist right away. He also suggested that I could try intravenous chelation, and that might help.
My daughter, who has so many questions of her own with You, dear God, said: "But don't you think that God can fix this? Isn't He mightier than any doctor or medicine?" I know she is right, and yet…
Karen suggested that this condition is from the past. I took her to mean past life. Karen has such faith in You, dear God. I mean, she has no doubt, no doubt. I would like to have that degree of confidence in You, dear God, and also in myself that I was receiving Your truth.
Then I had a flash of myself in chains where my legs and feet and hands and arms were terribly swollen from shackles. A little later I had a very quick but strong sense that You had healed me, dear God. There was no outward change, but there was a big easing inside me.
I am getting the idea that prayer to you about health is not so much in the asking, but in the receiving. I mean, if You have already healed me, I just have to know I am healed. That is the healing.
And then part of me thought, well, doesn't God also provide the human healers and doctors? And why wouldn't He want us to use them. I go to a dentist without hesitation. I don't wait for You to heal my teeth. Why would I not go to a doctor?
And then I think, well, if I were supposed to go for intravenous chelation, then I would have the money to go etc. so maybe then I'm just not supposed to do it.
So as usual I am confused.
I also feel fearful at putting all this out here for Heavenreaders to read because I feel that maybe this puts You on the line, and what if this condition worsens and I am not healed, and therefore their faith is shaken rather than strengthened? So then I am putting more faith in my fear thoughts than I am in You.
Forgive me for taking up so much space here. I didn't know how to make this shorter.
God to Gloria and all Heavenreaders:
Consider this also for a moment: You do not have to be healed. My "success" does not have to be in healing you. If you think I must heal, then you are attached to an outcome and not to My Will. What you consider success is a small part of what I do.
I am more than a healer. I am a guardian and teacher, and my vision far exceeds yours. That is why My children need faith. If you saw as far and as wide as I do, you would not need faith. You would have vision. So, as it is, I supply the vision, and you must supply the faith. I also have faith, of course, but My faith is inseparable from My vision. That is how I can have faith in you.
What I am saying is that the importance is not in your healing or not healing. Neither is proof of Me. Neither is proof of you. You merit, whatever your physical condition. And I merit, whatever your physical condition.
Faith in Me is not dependent upon My performance as you see it. You cannot see enough, but you can perceive that I do see. That scant perception of My vision and wisdom translates into faith. "Does God know or not know what He is doing?" That is your question. "Do I know better than God what should be happening? Do I want to be in control with my shortsightedness, or would I rather rely on God's eyesight?"
Whenever My children feel anxiety, it is because they fear I don't know or understand enough, and that they know more than I do. Now that is a terrible fear — to think that you, in your well-known ignorance might, just might, be more aware than I am. It is almost laughable, isn't it?
If My children did not tense up, if they could relax into faith in Me, the world would be more of what you want it to be.
Look not to miracle cures. Look to Me. I am the Miracle.
Health is to be expected. Why is there so much attention on non-health? So much attention on evidence of it, symptoms of it. Put that attention on Me, and you will have faith.
Whether you elect to go to a doctor or not, put your faith in Me.
Faith in Me does not mean you will have guaranteed results. It does not mean everything will come out the way you want. Faith means you will accept what I give. You won't debate it with Me.
Gloria, surely the faith of the world does not depend on your existence. It depends on Mine.
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Judith to God:
Dear God, after I wrote my question that You answered August 12, it became a little more clear in my experience what You meant. If I describe it, perhaps it will seem too rational, so I will not.
Thank You for Your letter to me. I am beginning to get it, God, that I simply have to let You in. You are here with me whether I choose to open my eyes or whether I choose to keep them shut! Ha!
I love You too.