Gloria:
Nancy L. has spoken of wanting the sense of unity with You. In your letter to Abby yesterday, You spoke of her heart having its sense of Oneness broken. It seems we either seek this Oneness with you or seek to maintain it or seek for it to come back.
God:
It is always seeking it back, for I am known to you.
Gloria:
Last week I was on a real high with You when I discovered My love for You. That day I was aware of You with me. All day I was thinking: "God and I walk down this street. God and I pick up the mail. God and I drive in this car." It was more beautiful than it sounds. The thing is I knew you were there with Me.
Then I went into a store where the clerk was not very nice to me. It was like she was suspicious of me. Then I realized I had let whatever was going on with her take me away from My joy of you, and that wonderful sense of Oneness with You got broken. Such a little thing, and I let my awareness of You fall away.
God:
You were concerned with what that clerk thought of you, so you let your awareness of Me drop. You were not neutral. You wanted to be in control. You wanted that saleslady to like you, value you, and treat you nicely. She didn't. It wasn't her discourtesy that broke your sense of Our Oneness. It was your demand for graciousness from her that let Me fade from your awareness.
Do not expect the world to love you as I do.
Do not be dismayed when it does not.
That lady needed the power of control. It is easy for you to see the menace that control is when it comes from another.
Letting go of control is the same as having awareness of Me. Letting go of control allows you to relax into the Oneness that is Ours. Needing control blocks the awareness of Oneness.
When you take a bath, you turn the water on. Then you step into the water. If the phone rings, do you have to get up? If you forgot a face cloth, do you have to get up? It is your choice whether to get up or not.
When you are immersed in Me, you have choice also. What pulls you out? Ego pulls you out.
Gloria:
Is it always ego? Is it ego then that keeps us away?
God:
Certainly. If your attention is on small things, it is on small things.
There is Oneness, and there is the illusion of separation. How can that illusion come to the surface unless ego has demanded the stage? When ego demands a false sovereignty, awareness of Oneness fades. Ego flaunts a lost cause. Ego sells you a bill of goods, and then it sells you out. Moments of triumph, but the ego always lets you down. You can depend on it.
Ego gives you a great-looking map, but sets you on a false trail, rubs its hands and feels exonerated and exhilarated, and then leaves you in the lurch. Ego promises you marriage, and then leaves you alone at the altar.
Ego is quite crafty and is good at what it does. It convinces you. It lures you. It seduces you and runs off for greater gain. It leaves you with the aftermath to deal with.
Gloria:
So in a way, ego serves a purpose.
God:
Everything serves a purpose, but to what avail? Do not make a hero of ego.
If you want to know what egolessness is, look at Me. Truth is egoless. Truth is a clean knife. Ego has a ragged edge.
A practical way to escape ego is to turn your head to Me. Serve Me, and not ego. I will bring you to truth. Ego is the false god. Ego is the idol that crumbles. Ego cares for nothing but itself and its career. It will step on your head to get ahead and leave you to pick up the pieces. Ego seems to be thinking of you but thinks of its own existence to the detriment of yours.
Ego is smallness in a big box.
Gloria:
Is the whole relative world ego?
God:
No, because I am there, here.
Gloria:
Would the world exist if there were no ego?
God:
It would have a different appearance. Remember, the relative only appears to be. It is only what you think it is. The world appears as it is according to your attention.
You can say that the world is what it is, but Christ lived in the world, and the world he lived in was not the world the others did. He brought some awareness to others of the simplicity of the world he lived in. He lived with Me. He knew he lived with Me. We lived together in harmony. He shared his life with Me. He never took his eyes off Me, and so he saw with the eyes of God.
Gloria:
When I woke up this morning, I asked You what you would like me to do today. And You said, "Be happy."
God:
Is that too much to ask? To be happy as a gift to Me?
Gloria:
No. But can I do it on demand?
God:
Not demand, but offer. I offer you happiness everyday. The question is: Will you accept it? Do you accept it? Will you accept this gift of Myself that I offer you?
Gloria:
I'd like to.
God:
There is big difference in being happy for yourself or happy for Me — as a gift for Me. It seems to Me little enough to accept the gift I give you. To accept it graciously. To say, "Yes, thank You."
Yes, you must learn to accept what I offer.