Gloria to God:
Dear God, on the subject of dying, I know someone who had a long painful illness. She never complained. When anyone went to see her, she was happy to see them and interested in their lives. She was an angel. She was the ideal dying person. Was the difference that she had You, dear God?
God:
She knew she had Me. She looked forward to Heaven. She knew her death, as long and as painful as it was, was her journey to Heaven. She knew she was on earth to give My love to others. She did not fight her body's death. She did not fight her love. She was not frightened.
She did not arrive at this just at the time of her death or the time of her death drawing near.
In life you knew her as an ordinary person with ordinary concerns. You did not know that she was a hero. She did not know. Before her dying time, you never thought: "Here is someone who never complains." But that was the case.
Do you want to know what the secret is to that?
It is to never feel sorry for yourself. Alannah never felt sorry for herself her whole life. She is an example of how your life is not what happens to you. No matter what, she picked herself up, brushed the dust off, and went forward with a smile. She was that her whole life. So it was no different for her in her body's dying. Discomfort simply was not what she put her attention on.
It is good to practice not complaining. How you do that is by putting your attention on what you appreciate. Practice being pleased. That is a rule for life that I will give. Practice being pleased. No, I will change that. See what pleases you. That is more honest. Don't behave pleased. Be pleased. See what pleases you. It is there.
No one knows when or what their death will be. The odds are that how you look at your life is how you will look at your death. But there are exceptions to that. No matter what one's life may have been or seemed, one may be a hero at the time of death.
In one sense, every moment of life is a death. It is a moving on. The past moment has fallen off. You are not a stranger to transition.
Now attend to your life, and not your body's death. Your life.
Judy to Gloria:
Dear Gloria, I wonder if you asked God about the one year anniversary after a death for a concern of yours or was it something I spoke to you about?
Gloria to Judy:
I was thinking about my father.
The following was written before she saw God's last answer to her. — Gloria
Judy to God:
Dear God, I have been deciding about this very thing regarding my mom, as her one-year anniversary is approaching in April. Your Heavenletter addressed one of my concerns. It was very helpful to me.
Also, God, Your response about surrender… this was so beautiful. I asked myself what prevents me in this particular situation from letting go of the past, and it is the need to be forgiven. God, will You tell me how we can forgive ourselves after a loved one has passed away?
I know that my mother has done this already, it's just me that has to do it now. Thank You, dear God.
God to Judith:
What is it exactly that you think you need to forgive yourself for?
That your mother's body died?
Were you responsible? You hardly have the power of life and death, Judith.
That your relationship prior to her passing was not the ideal you would have liked?
There must be something that you accuse yourself of, or you wouldn't think you need to forgive yourself.
Of what do you accuse yourself?
Do I accuse you?
Does anyone else?
If you think you need to forgive yourself of something, then there is something you feel guilty about.
Guilt is not honorable. It is honorless. It is ego, dear Judith. It is an unwarranted self-beating. It is a little drama. Guilt has as much value as false pride does.
Consider guilt a winter coat that you now take off in the summer. The winter of your life has past. You don't need that coat. Just as easily as you take off a heavy winter coat, take off any sense of guilt you have inflicted upon yourself. In fact, this is a coat to give away. Hand it over to Me, and never put it on again. In fact, this one is moth-eaten.
You are under My tutelage now, Judith. I will teach you joy. Learn only what I teach you. Unlearn everything else.
You used the expression lock, stock, and barrel once in reference to Me. Do you see that it is your mother's world you have bought lock, stock, and barrel?
Beating the chest is not necessary. It does not make you better. It makes you less. Not really, but that is how you treat yourself when you lade yourself with guilt — as if you were less.
If you were perfect in life in your eyes, you probably wouldn't be on earth. But I would like you to look on yourself with My eyes that do see your perfection. I see a bright glowing soul.
You are here to learn how to be a human being, an effortless beneficent human being. When have you been less than beneficent, dear Judith? I am not familiar with any time that you have wanted to inflict pain on another. Effortless is another story, and one you are learning.
Your mother chose her life. Now you choose yours. You have already chosen Me. I am your choice now, not something less.
Keep your eyes high on Me, dear Judith, and I will guide you through life like a beautiful salmon in a golden splashing stream.