Marsha to God:
Dear God, I am terribly frustrated. For the past four years, I have had a lot of intestinal problems with worms, bacteria and yeast. I have been seeing a specialist and have taken multiple tests, and still the problem has persisted. I have taken a lot of prescription medication and every vitamin under the sun. And still I have no relief. Tests are still showing a lot of infection.
Emotionally I am unhappy, impatient, angered easily, depressed and exhausted. I sleep restfully nine hours a night, and yet still wake up exhausted and edgy. I feel angry. I feel angered that I still have all of these problems after four years and spending lots of money and still no end in sight. I do not know how to get rid of these parasites. What do I have to do to get rid of them?
God, I am angry with You. Over the past thirty-eight years, I have had different physical problems, and there seems to be no relief in sight. You have allowed me to suffer. I want to be healthy and happy. I am tired of suffering and want You to help me because I deserve it and I am a good person.
God to Marsha:
Dear Marsha, first of all, I know you are good. I have never thought otherwise. Now I would like you to begin to consider the possibility that I also am good. I was good enough to create you, Marsha. Will you sit down and write all that is in My creation that you do like? Approve of? Don't mind? Can tolerate? Don't mind too much? Isn't so bad?
Do this as soon as you finish reading this. Without explanation. Just write down what I may have done that pleases you, even sort of. And then We will talk more.
Marsha, it is not My desire nor choice that you suffer. That is not how I think and envision your life.
But this is how you see yours. On one hand, you expect mistreatment, and on the other you demand good treatment. You stamp your foot, shaking the floor, and stamp your foot some more because the floor shakes.
And so you let the past rule you, dictate to you, and keep you unfulfilled. And you deal with life the way you think I've dealt with you.
What if you were mistaken, dear Marsha, all these years? What if you had an inkling of the love I hold for you? If you could have that inkling, would you breathe better?
You feel that the baton is in your hand, and that you have to direct the orchestra. This wears you out, taking responsibility for what you cannot. You give yourself an impossible task, for you do not hold the baton. It is not for you to orchestrate the universe. Not even your immediate world.
Put that baton down. It is too heavy. You do not accomplish with it. When you let go of the baton, you will feel more energy and more love.
My dear Marsha, you need to accept love.
That is all you need to do.
Accept it. Learn to accept it.
When you ease into accepting love, your frustration will disappear. Your frustration has become a host to parasites. They feed on that frustrated energy.
You are going to do great good, Marsha.
You have frustrated the good you are to do.
You have great energy, but you disburse it on small things.
Look higher.
Look differently.
There are many ways to learn to do this. One good way is to read Heavenletters. That is what it is for.
The subscription to it is yours as well as your husband's.
Somehow you have to bypass your husband in this, Marsha, for he, as well as you, wants to orchestrate. Your heart has to belong to you; you have to own your own growth, spiritual or otherwise. He is not to make himself responsible for you. He is not your father, anymore than you are his mother. You are two good people who live together, but neither operates the other's life.
As for your relationship with Me, what We do is serve one another. You and I serve each other, Marsha.
Will you write down what you find to your liking, more or less, in the world and in your life, and then write back another question to Me c/o Heavenletters? We want to talk more. I have been waiting for you a long time, Marsha. I have been waiting for you.
* * *
Nancy L. to Gloria:
Dear Gloria, what a great message Thursday!
Let me give you an example of how Heaven has directly helped me.
As you know, I have been taking care of an elderly couple several nights a week. Usually they both sleep through the night, and I sleep on a recliner in the living-room.
Last night the husband got up at 2:00 a.m., ready and dressed for breakfast, and I was annoyed.
Then I remembered to think: "This is God," and I really wasn't annoyed anymore! (although I did hope that "God" would go back to bed!)
But he did not, so I made a good breakfast for him at 2 a.m.
It wasn't very long before both of us were sitting in recliners and dozing off again.
God to Nancy L.:
Nancy, I appreciate your kindness to My old friend.
Nancy O. to Gloria:
Dear Gloria, yes, I sent Julie's letter out to a bunch of people I thought might be interested.
I have really enjoyed the messages of the Heavenletters and am so glad I have a subscription. A letter from God is the first thing I look for each morning.
Keep up the good work! It is very important to all of us.
God to Nancy O.:
Gloria wouldn't know how to stop if she wanted to. And she doesn't want to. She would be bereft without writing Me down and sharing Me with all of you. I hope you see how your reading Heaven strengthens it.