Gloria to God:
Dear God, my former husband is visiting my daughter for a few days. There were many years at a stretch when there was no contact, so it is miraculous that he comes to visit. Something must bring him here, but, even so, he seems unable to give Lauren affection or regard. Rather, he makes cutting remarks and puts her down. Strangers are by far nicer to her.
Lauren is out of work, and, for example, he said, "Did anybody ever give you a recommendation?"
He told her several times that he took his other daughter on a cruise to Australia.
There are many more examples. But never mind. I have to ask myself some questions. Why did I marry this man? Why did I give Lauren a father like him when I had a sweet father?
Karen, who is so close to You and Mary and Jesus, points out that it is myself I feel sad for, that these are my issues. She said my father had pain, and I married a man in pain.
But it is hard for me to make any connection between this man and my father. They were so different, and each made me feel quite differently.
The only thing I can think of is that my mother dominated my father, and I can remember thinking: I will never dominate my husband.
And it appears that I married a man who could guarantee that I wouldn't.
Now I have wanted to say something to him like: "Lauren can use some kindness and affection from you. Could you say something nice to her?"
Yesterday I had an opportunity to say something along this line. He said that when Lauren visits him in California, he doesn't take her to fine restaurants because he doesn't go to them himself, and so why would he?
I said, "Because you would like to do something nice for her. Give her some happiness. Treat her." It fell on deaf ears.
Dear God, will You help me get past this, and will You help Lauren the same? She says that with her father, she is like the person who keeps putting her finger on the hot stove and is surprised each time when she gets burned.
God:
You were used to being treated cruelly but not by your father.
You married your former husband when you were down on life and on yourself. You were looking for a way out. Superficially, he fit the bill — an attorney, stable, same religion.
Perhaps you felt you needed to be punished.
Now you continue to be punished by his treatment of your daughter.
Someone who is caustic is caustic. Yet he might not be so inclined with someone who is more neutral.
I wonder why you and Lauren kowtow to him. You think you are being polite, but you are tiptoeing around him who disregards you. You do not need to win points with him. What is his approval worth to you? What would you have when you got it? The same as you have now without it.
And you know that he is not the issue.
Your feelings about yourself are the issue. Your connection to Me is the issue.
Tell Lauren that I am her Father, and I am the only father she needs. I am the only Father.
If she is looking for love and acceptance, she will find it with Me.
Tell her not to color her view of Me with her earth father.
Her father, in his indifference to others' hearts, brings her to Me, and for that she can thank him.
Lauren needs nothing but Me.
She searches for happiness in places where she will be hurt. She searches for hurt to prove her unworthiness.
My other name is Happiness. I am so readily available. I am easy.
I seek only to love Lauren and make her whole.
I need nothing from her. I play no games. I only need Lauren in order to fulfill her, and thus I am fulfilled.
Lauren, despite all her closeness to Me, thinks I am imaginary, that I am a placebo, and will disappoint her like everything else.
I appoint her. I appoint her My child to whom I give happiness and mandate that she give happiness to herself.
I appoint her to pick out this thorn from her heart and replace it with Me. Let Me be your father, Lauren.
Stop playing the same record.
When you spend time with Me, when you allow yourself to, worldly happiness will knock at your door. I think you have had it backward.
As for you, Gloria, say to your former husband: "Do you love Lauren?"
If he says, "Yes," which he will, then say: "Can you tell her that? She doesn't know it."
He is blind, and one who is not must show him the way.
You must do this for you, Gloria.
You are learning to be honest, and you are not honest with your former husband. You never were.
You can be now. You don't have to enter his terrain. Introduce him to yours.
You and Lauren are also in his life for a reason. You do not have to know the reason, but you do have to be honest.
You know how to be honest — and kind.
Don't put off your honesty, for there will not be another time.
You and Lauren owe nothing to him. You owe to yourselves.
When you are honest with him, you will leave him. You have never left him. Your relationship, or non-relationship, clouds you, too, as well as Lauren.
You step up to a higher step, and you keep bending down to the one you left.
Give blessings to the ones you leave behind, and then keep both your feet where your heart is.
Now, Mother Divine will say something to Lauren. It is for everyone.
Mother Divine:
Feel your own love. That is God's. Never mind someone else's. God is the rope you hold on to. When you have that, you can swing on a ribbon and not fall.
Attach yourself to God. He has the strength. No one else has.
You do not lean on a weak wall.
Do not lean on other people. Do not depend on them to hold you up.
God holds you anyway, so you might as well know it.
He is your support. Nothing else is.
You would not sit on a broken chair, but how much do you still depend on broken people?
Wholeness is of God. He asks you to be partner, and you continue to look for another, even something you hope is better.
There is no equal to God.
Introduce yourself to Him, and He will introduce you to all your dreams.
This is not exaggeration. This is how it happens. This is the only way it happens.
Whether you acknowledge it or not, God is your server, your waiter. He brings you your order.
He is your taxi.
He is your door man.
He is your travel agent.
He is your source of sweetness and wealth.
Bank on Him.
Sign up.
Walk right in.
There is a place waiting for you, just for you, all beautiful and ready for you, made for you as you were made for it.
Welcome yourself to Heaven.
Let yourself in.
You have the key.
Use it.
Don't hesitate.
It all belongs to you.
It is yours.
Own up to it.
Own it.
See, it has your name.
A place is set for you.
Sit down and eat.
.
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READER COMMENTS
Gloria to Heavenreaders:
Dear Heavenreaders, yesterday I said something like this to my former husband: "Lauren needs a lot of love from you. I know you wouldn't come out here unless you loved her, but she doesn't know you love her." His response was that Lauren should be talking to him herself, which is true, only she can't, and I said that. I felt that my words hurt him, for he seemed to shrink physically into himself. He did try to be more convivial, but neither he nor Lauren were able to speak their hearts with one another.
There was certainly no magic transformation in this one-minute exchange.
But I was transformed. From that minute on, I felt lighter, as if he had changed from a huge ogre to a little old man whose vision goes only two inches around him and no further.
But Lauren cried some of the way home and is still dealing heavily with her feelings about him and herself.
I want to thank all of you for your beautiful outpourings of understanding and love, and I take the liberty of including some here.
Kerry to Gloria and God:
Dearest Gloria and GOD, I am so extremely moved by yesterday's HEAVENLETTERS, most especially the parts about honesty and dealing with a caustic soul! God, you really zapped me with that one…I suspect I am not alone in feeling a very personal connection…Blessings to you, Lauren and Gloria…It takes such courage to expose your very tender hearts and turn them over to GOD and Divine Mother…To be so open and vulnerable and receive the outpouring of Love from GOD, even when very human people bruise those tender hearts, is truly inspiring and sacred.
Another Heavenreader:
What a beautiful message today! Your question was what brought out God's beautiful response to remind us of who we really are. I'll be reading it over and over — it really hit home for me. I need to keep being reminded. Thank you. I send much love to you and Lauren and pray that you both have the strength to follow God's advice.
Julie:
What a beautiful message. Hopefully it will reach Lauren's heart. And yours. I always thrill when I hear God's words. This is for everyone. Such a wonder and a joy.
Karen:
Yesterday's HEAVEN about Lauren and you — What wonderful encouragements of truth!
Johanna:
I really enjoyed your letter today about your ex-husband.
I went through that whole sadness tonight. I was sitting there thinking why can't I walk out. I know this is wrong so why can't I leave?
I went home very sad and was going to write to God, but I ended up writing to my boyfriend, and I wrote down everything that I needed from the relationship, really stating that it was okay if that was not what he wanted but that it was what I needed, and he was free to never speak to me again.
It was almost like the business contract that you helped me work on. I wrote down all of my requirements for what I believed was a good relationship for me.
When I finished my letter I was no longer sad. I was actually peacefully happy, knowing that I was good and my desires for my self were good. I delivered the letter and that is that.
Reading your letter I realized that God would say that I'm being too co-dependent, but I want a relationship that is dependable.
Thank you so much!