Have you, somewhere along the line in life, perhaps at an early age, learned that suffering comes along with the territory of Earth? That you must surrender to suffering, that one way or another, suffering will reach out for you and pin you down? Have you thought you must prepare for suffering, that you must steel yourself against suffering?
You are prepared. Ready, set, go. You stiffen against suffering. It is not so easy for you to bounce back. Perhaps you are resigned to a fate of suffering. You invent unfavorable odds and give yourself slim pickings.
My dears, getting yourself ready for suffering makes you tense. Anticipated suffering and the actual onset of suffering both make you tense. Suffering and/or fear of suffering render you pain. For this lifetime, you may been geared to wait for pain. You have been on the look-out for it. Ready and waiting for suffering, you make yourself a ready target. Life hits the bull's eye with you.
Surely, no matter how deep your desires may be, the fulfillment of your desires still leaves you with inevitably more desires to be desired and, in danger of not receiving. You forewarn yourself. You have more yet to want, and all your desires and their fulfillment thereof may not yet have reached your door.
Perhaps you have been addressing life in this way. You have been saying to life: "Hurry up! Get on with it. I am suffering. I am suffering because I am made to wait for what I desire. Life, answer my desires now. Gimme gimme what I cry for."
Have you not yet come to the realization that stamping your foot, or begging, or whining do not bring to you what you want? The fact that you strongly want something, no matter how much you want it and no matter how much you deserve it doesn't mean that it has to come to you on schedule or come to you at all. Sometimes, simply not expecting nor demanding anything may hasten its arrival at your door. The arrival of your desires is not the only purpose you have for being on Earth.
It's perfectly fine to accept what comes to you certainly. What makes you think it's also perfectly fine for you to also gripe about what has not yet reached you?
You might ask Me: "God, why does my thinking about suffering bring suffering to me while my thinking about what I want does not necessarily bring what I want right up to me? What is this about?"
Dear Ones, no explanations needed. We don't have to know why. Your wanting an explanation already suggests a certain amount of disgruntlement. Likely as not, you probably believe in suffering more than you believe in good fortune. You may be left with resentment and have some kind of vendetta with life. Hardly a good sport. Hardly taking life as it comes.
"This is what happened," or, "This is what didn't happen." That's all you or anyone knows. Don't jump to conclusions as to why or why not. Who knows even what really is happening in the first place, let alone why or why not? Don't be so sure you know. You can make a lot of guesses and never know.
Better to ask yourself: "Hmm, where do I go from here?"
You want to know: "What is my next step? Am I champion or a defeatist? How much do I hold on? And how much do I let go? And how much does it really matter? Have I put all my marbles of joy in one bag, and, therefore, now I pout?"
You yourself are the one to ask. Not the world. You don't have to boo-hoo.
Like it or not, Life doesn't owe you a living. Life itself is a great gift given to you. Be glad. Be grateful. Say thank you, and see where life takes you next.
What trail are you following now?