Sometimes it is worthy to keep your opinions to yourself. Often it is. In order to do this, you have to not take other people’s opinions so to heart. You don’t want to be dismayed by them. Different opinions are not meant to cause a duel of words. Different opinions are only different opinions. Your opinions may change, or they may not. The other’s opinions may change, or may not. But what difference do opinions make? And what business of yours are the opinions that others may hold?
You may say you have to stick up for what is right. This can well be true. It isn’t always true. In that case, you are speaking to hear your own voice. In most cases, Beloveds, say what you have to say, and then go do something else. No matter how right you may be, no one is obliged to agree with you. Often the more you debate, the more the other person digs his heels in. Maybe you enjoy arguing. And maybe the other person does too. Then it is a collaboration. In that case, enjoy yourselves.
If you, however, do not enjoy arguments, why then enter into them? And if someone else doesn’t like to argue, why involve them? We are talking about opinions here, not matters of life and death.
Leaving another to their own opinions is not the same as agreeing. Why should another have to agree with you any more than you have to agree with another? What is so marvelous about agreement? Especially when it comes down to a matter of words. In that case, what are you changing? Perhaps you can listen. Perhaps there really is no argument.
If you want peace, make peace with yourself.
This is not to say: Peace at all costs. Not at all. Perhaps your integrity is not an issue. Perhaps your stubbornness is.
Resistance doesn’t have to be a bottleneck. Your resistance to another’s way of seeing will help you to know what you do think. It makes you take a good look at what perhaps you have merely glanced over. It may well help you know what you do think. This can also be done without a heated argument. Just remember, Beloveds, you don’t have to be adamant, and you too can also find that your opinion has to change. You can step down from it. You can change your opinion without damage. You don’t have to keep it because you once had it. You don’t have to keep it just because you don’t want to come down off it. Don’t get up there in the first place.
The more you care for another, the more you may want to influence them. And the more futile it may be.
I understand that you care. Care enough then to allow the other person to be mistaken. Sometimes saying nothing more is the quickest way to get your point and your love across.
And have you not had arguments where, at some point, you don’t even know what you are arguing about? You both kept on, and it was argument for the sake of argument. Whose voice could get louder? Who has the most emotion? Who has the most logic? Be wary about having to prove something.
What do you gain that is so great when another’s thinking does change and now he agrees with you? And has this not sometimes or often been a great let-down for you? The fuss is all over. You were enjoying the fuss, and now it’s over. What then, Beloveds. What then.