When you feel angry with someone, they have become like the posters that are used at target practice. It is really a poster copy of the person that you are shooting at. You are not seeing the real person, and you are not seeing him or her through the eyes of compassion. You are seeing yourself with great compassion however. Even pity. And you have made a god of the other person, it would seem, because you entitle him to the power to make you glower, to tighten your heart, to lower your vibration and to give you indigestion.
You have sculpted the other person in your imagination. You have recreated him. I am speaking now of matters that don't matter except to your ego which has honored them with greatness. Your ego considers these little matters unforgivable, certainly nervy, certainly uncalled for, for you are always innocent. Innocent, you make yourself victim.
And of the other faulty Human being, you have made him into a one-dimensional figure that, in your mind, you take pot shots at. Because of the affront to your ego, you appoint yourself judgment supreme. You wrap yourself in a robe of justice and seat yourself high on a throne from where you judge what is acceptable and not acceptable for someone to say or do where you are concerned. With your gavel, you find this other person guilty. Regardless of the particular accusations and infractions of your self-made laws, what you find him guilty of is being a Human being. Pardon him instead.
I do not excuse anyone from the responsibility of their actions, nor do I accuse. Nor must you. Nor do I ask you to excuse anyone. It is not your business to excuse anyone. But it is your business to forgive everyone. Forgiveness does not mean making excuses. Forgiveness does not rationalize. Forgiveness gets at truth.
There need not be extenuating circumstances in order to forgive someone. There is no other choice but forgiveness that will bring healing and health. Everyone has had a less than perfect childhood. Everyone has experienced problems and suffering. Everyone has been denied, misunderstood, discounted. Even Kings and Queens are put into a mold that is not always their choice.
The extenuating circumstance is that your ego was affronted. Someone lied to you, or changed their mind, or was impolite. And so you convince yourself that they stole something from you that they had no right to. But they stole nothing from you.
They simply lived their life as they saw fit in one moment or another. Perhaps they did not see clearly. Perhaps they made a mistake. Perhaps they didn't see your point of view. Perhaps they weren't considering you at all. Perhaps they considered that they did not have to consult you in the running of their life. Perhaps they thought they could go by their own viewpoint and not yours. Perhaps they didn't think at all. Perhaps you thought too much.
Your analysis of why they did what they did and how they could do that to you or the world or someone else only serves to embed their fall from grace deeper into your heart. Stop trying to figure it out. Forgive instead.
Forgive them for being less than you thought they were. Forgive them for your impressions. Forgive them for not living their life according to your standards.
One day they will no longer be on earth, and where will your animosity go then? Your anger and disdain and private despair are hurtful things, and you made up an object for them. Release the anger etc., and foolishness will be ended, and forgiveness will have been done.
Forgiveness is the release of that which you do not want to keep to you. It is the release of anything that would harden and constrict your beautiful heart of Mine.