You are the hero or heroine of your own life, and you are doing very well. You may think you are flubbing up, but you are marvelously on track.
I have guided you more than you know.
Life has corralled you, allowed you to try certain paths, had you come back from them and try another. You want guidance, but you don't always like it. You want freedom too, and you don't always like that either.
Life seems like a maze to you. Be easy. You will find your way. All you can do is put one foot after the other. When you feel confused and don't seem to know which way to go, that's all right. You neither need to stomp nor do you need to tread lightly. It is perfectly fine to go one way and then decide to go another. Life never was about certainty. Therefore, certainty is not necessary. Certainty comes to a conclusion, and you are one who keeps going.
If you feel lost, you can keep going the same way, or you can go back and try another. All paths will take you somewhere. You may no longer want to go a certain way, but no turn is wrong. For every step or seeming misstep, there is another step to take. Nothing is irrevocable.
When you reach an exit to the maze, you will see that it was not a maze at all. It was a fully orchestrated orchestra. Not all the instruments played all at once. Some chimed in at certain times. Some instruments played loudly and some played softer. Some were strong and some were plaintive. Some played for long stretches, and some were staccato. And each was its own truth. Each note was pure. Even those off-key notes were perfect off-key notes.
Life seen as a whole is like that orchestra. Wherever you are at this moment, you are in the right place and you strike the right note. You may strike it only once and would never again, but it was the right note struck at that moment. No matter how off it sounded to you, in terms of the orchestra complete, you played a note that sang to the whole.
Perhaps your seeming mis-note woke someone else up. Perhaps it woke you up. If you had not played it, you might not have learned the other notes you've learned to play.
Once a note has been played, it has been played. It may linger a while but it ends. When it ends, it no longer exists. It was just a note that was played. Once played, here comes another note.
The orchestra continues anew. Every note played is new. The combinations are marvelous. A sweet mixture, never to be repeated in the exact same way. Never to be heard in the exact same way.
All of life is a practice. The practice is it. This practice right now is the perfect moment. Just as it is. Whatever befalls, it is only a note that befalls.
We can consider that I am the Source of the music. You are the conductor, the violin, and the violinist. You are all the instruments. And all the players. No matter what, it is My music that you play. There is no other.
I am the music, and I created the orchestra that plays My music.
Perhaps you are just learning. Perhaps your fingers are not long enough as yet. Perhaps you hear My music in a different cadence. But you are, nevertheless, a player in the orchestra of God. Keep playing. You don't have to understand your rendition of God-given life. Yet, perhaps, some day you will.